Letting Go of the Need to Make Things Happen
Posted Wednesday, September 21st, 2011
“You are not in control. You don’t need to understand. You don’t need to try to make things happen.”
Those words, in one form or another, have been coming through to me regularly for more than a year in the messages I continue to receive and transcribe.
It’s as if the Universe were hitting me over the head with a cosmic two-by-four. Sometimes it takes a while for things to sink in for me.
I’ve written before about the early messages I was given as a kid about not being good enough, and for most of my life I felt a need to prove myself – to show the world that I was, in fact, good enough.
That translated into an internal push to “accomplish” one thing or another – to use what I perceived as my own human ingenuity to move heaven and earth (now isn’t that an interesting phrase!) to have things turn out the way I thought they should.
Those efforts over the years eventually led to a series of frustrations or disappointments that, in turn, reinforced my beliefs about my own inadequacies. Talk about a vicious cycle!
Learning the lesson about letting go of the need to make things happen on my own has been an ongoing process, but I keep making progress.
As many of you know, for many years I resisted the regular internal nudges I had been getting about sharing the lessons I had been receiving with others.
The resistance was partly from my fear about what other people would think, but also partly from my concern that I knew nothing about publishing a book – nor had ever had any desire to do so. How could I ever make that happen?
But once I finally was willing and able to surrender to those urgings and simply allow the book to happen, things began to fall into place without my need to figure out what to do next or how I would need to do it.
Letting go can be a life-changing experience.
Several weeks ago I wrote about the frustrations I felt after deciding to become involved with social media. I didn’t understand what to do, and I didn’t have anyone to help me, so I sat at my computer for hours on end, all day long, trying to figure it out and make things happen so the world could learn about the book.
After all, I thought, the lessons had come through me, and they could give people a new perspective on life that might help them make more sense of their own journeys, so I felt a responsibility to find a way to get the word out. Yet the harder I worked to understand it all the more frustrated I became, because from my perspective nothing was happening.
Then I took a long time-out. Over a period of about six months earlier this year, I devoted most of my time and energy to finding a house where Joan and I could consolidate our two homes into one, and then to the logistics of the move and the creation of our new home.
I had let go completely of the need to make things happen about the book.
And then new ideas began popping up in my mind about ways to share the teachings that wouldn’t require me to become an whiz on the internet. I could start blogging regularly. I could give people an opportunity to get excerpts from the book three times a week by e-mail. I could begin doing conference calls where I could talk about the book and answer people’s questions.
The ideas keep coming, and I feel free. And to top it all off, the Universe responded to my calls for help when a friend offered to handle some of the internet stuff I don’t have a clue about!
I’m guessing that the struggle to make things happen on our own is something we all deal with to one extent or another. I want to assure you that it is possible to let go and simply allow.